Stumbled upon this Tumblr page:
Giggled all the way through it (which turned into a chortle, morphing into a guffaw, and then I had a coughing fit). But it was worth it.
Mmm… this is why I dine at my local “hamburger outlet.” Where else am I offered a “choice” between four condiments that are added and omitted at random? God, please let it be mustard and onions.
I knew there was more learning to be done in this life of mine.